He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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