butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
