I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize