im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
