so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
