She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
