R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
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