What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
