How'd it feel making her break her religion?
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
