he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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