My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
