We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
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