why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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