so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
