I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
