NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
