i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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