Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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