I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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