I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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