so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Randomize
