I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
