Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
this boner is exhausting
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
my liver is dry heaving
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
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