yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I wish there were birth control emojis
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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