We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Randomize
