She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
