Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
