There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
