Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize