is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
