Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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