i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize