yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
We need to get me chipped asap
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize