rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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