And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
