"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Randomize