Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize