go do what you do best...puke behind churches
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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