Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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