i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Randomize
