you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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