I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
