I wannas sexs uuuuu
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
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