Girls should come with a carfax report
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I enjoy the company of your penis
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
