So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Randomize
