I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
