quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Randomize
