i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Randomize
