Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
i out mim tonsoeep
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