The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Randomize
