This girl is more easily done than said...
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Randomize
