quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Randomize
